I was at a party when a client’s business partner approached me.
Client: Hey, [Client] tells me you could answer a computer question for me.
Me: Depends. What’s the question?
Client: My computer stopped working the other day. The light comes on but nothing happens.
Me: Well, it’s hard to say what might be the problem from just that. It could be something simple, it could be that something needs replacing.
Client: Pfft! That’s the best you can come up with? What a waste of my time.
The only time I remember seeing something like this was when I was setting up a disk array and the drives were still initializing (or were not yet configured). This? This is not good. My thoughts go out to you and your colon…
Thanks to Michael and Marco via Google+ for this.
11:11:13 Initializing Partyscript
11:11:43 Loading Enhanced Alcohol Destruction Module (EADM)
11:11:49 Enhanced Alcohol Destruction Module loaded
11:11:50 Activating Visual Female Scan Device (Eye)
11:11:51 Visual Female Scan Device activated
11:11:52 Starting Shake and Dance Routine (SSDR)
11:11:59 Shake and Dance Routine started
11:12:03 All Done – Partyserver up and running
11:42:15 (EADM) -> processed 15 Beer
11:52:39 (SSDR) -> Powering up lower extremities
11:55:23 (EADM) -> Activating Latinoloverhipswing Routine
12:13:02 (EADM) -> processed 6 Beer
12:48:42 (EYE) -> Detected 52 possible Female Targets so far
13:23:19 (EADM) – processing 1 Beer
——— LAST MESSAGE REPEATED 23 times
15:59:54 Starting Hornybehaviour Script (HBS)
16:13:33 (SSDR) -> Input Overflow from EADS -> Activating Balance adjusting subroutine on lower extremeties
16:24:53 (HBS) Idle…
16:25:03 (EYE) Adjusiting Scan Level
16:25:04 (EYE) Scanlevel changed from “Germanys next Topmodel” to “2 more beer and i take her home”
16:32:59 (EADM) Input overflow on Buffer
——— LAST MESSAGE REPEATED 15 times
17:45:43 (EYE) Level changed 3 more times to lower level
17:49:54 (EYE) Scanned possible Input-Output Device
17:52:55 (SSDR) Giving more power to Latinoloverhipswing Routine
17:55:02 (EYE) WARNING: RESCANNED DEVICE: — ERRORS WILL BE MADE —-
17:55:03 (EYE) Caught Kill-Signal from Braindevice – exiting
18:03:23 (SSDR) SUCCESSFULL linked to scanned Device
19:21:49 (EADS) WARNING: CRITICAL LEVEL REACHED
19:34:21 (EADS) 2>&1 /dev/toilet
19:45:14 (HBS) PAAAAAAAARRRRRTYYYYY
22:34:10 THE SYSTEM IS GOING DOWN FOR REBOOT NOW
Picture Source: [Daniel Morris (CC)]
Some of our readers might not be old enough to remember the terrible plight of the floppy-based installations for “large” programs back in the 90′s. Rather than tell you all of how bad it was, here is a video that accurately depicts the frustration of installing something like Windows 95 or Office 97…
Come to think of it, the only thing worse than waiting for the installation to complete was when disk 24 of 25 was corrupt – amiright?