Sounds like there has been an increase is these sorts of calls lately. Anyone catch a number or IP for these jerks?

Usually it’s the customers being idiots, but today, it was the other way around.

I got a call this morning.

Me: Hello?

Woman (Very unintelligible foreign voice) Hello, is this Mr.Derp?

Me:Yes, this is him. Can I help you?

Woman: We just wanted you to know that your PC and or Mac is under danger from spyware virus hackers (Exact words)

Me: Really? How so?

Woman: Can you please follow my instructions on your PC and or Mac?

Me: I suppose I can ma’am

Woman: Okay Mr.Derp, do you have a PC or a Mac?

Me: I have a PC.

Woman: Thank you. Do you know what type of PC it is? Can you give me information?

Me: Dell XPS 420

Woman: Good, good. That’s very good. Can please press the button with the Windows Logo in it? Then press R.

Me: Okay, I’ll open the Run menu.

Woman: What is the run menu?

Me:(I attempt not to laugh at the women) The prompt you just told me to enter.

Woman:Oh, okay. Thank you. Now type this in. (I had her repeat this next part about five times, she is very difficult to understand). P as in Peter, R as in Reverend, E as in Eagle, F as in Fox, E as in England which is my home country (her exact words), T as in Teal, H as in Hooray.

Me: Okay, I have the prefetch folder open. What next?

Woman: I am going to transfer call. Please hold

(You can hear her talking to another woman in the background.)

Woman 2: Hello?

Me: Hello.

Woman 2: Okay I need you to follow these steps.

(She makes me open the Run Prompt again, it takes about 10 minutes because I confuse her saying “Run Prompt”. She makes me go to a file uploading website.)

Woman 2: What is the main purpose of your computer?

Me:It’s a gaming PC.

Woman 2: Computers cannot do that, sir.

(I about died laughing here)

Me: Yes they can, that’s what I do with my PC.

Woman 2: Do you browse the web? Do you shop? Do you use the Email?

Me: Yeah, I do all of those.

Woman 2: Then we need to clear your computer of spyware virus hackers. Please upload your prefetch files on our website and we will clear the hackers from the files, then you can download them and replace the other files with them.

Me: That wouldn’t work.

Woman 2: Just do it, sir.

I hang up.

via: [Reddit\talesfromtechsupport]