My Dearest Amy…

Like any website with a contact form, The Daily WTF gets its share of spam. In addition to saying the darndest things, spammers will often push SEO services with a message like this.

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net 
Sent: Wednesday, June 20, 2012 7:03 PM
To: Alex Papadimoulis
Subject: let's succeed together
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Hi,

My name is Amy Thompson and I would really love to tell you 
how thedailywtf.com can rank even better in Google.

I'm a SEO expert working at SEO Search Results and while doing
a research for some of my colleagues I found your email address and
decided to contact you immediately.

If you are interested I will be happy to send the additional 
information and all the details needed to make it happen.

Thanks a lot,

Amy
seosearchresults.net

Normally, I’d just ignore these emails. But this time – perhaps because I had one dram of scotch too many – I decided to respond.

From: Alex Papadimoulis 
Sent: Wednesday, June 20, 2012 7:05 PM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: let's succeed together
--------------------------------------------------------------------

YES!!!!! LET’S SUCCEED TOGETHER!!!!!

I’ll admit, it wasn’t a very creative response, and most people wouldn’t respond to a message like mine. But then again, Amy isn’t like most people.

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net 
Sent: Thursday, June 28, 2012 2:00 AM 
To: Alex Papadimoulis 
Subject: Hello Alex Re: let's succeed together 
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Hello Alex :) 

Thank you for getting back to me so fast, I'd like to tell you more 
about my previous email :) 

I have a beautiful website that I would like to show you: 
http://www.[redacted].com/ What I would like to do with you is actually 
placing a fresh page for your article with unique content that will 
speak about your site and will contain 2 or 3 links toward your site; 
1 link to the homepage and 2 more links that will be directed to 2 
different inner pages of your site. 

In return, I would like the same; that a new Article page will be 
created for me on your site. I would like to write a page what will 
speak about Safe Online Casino Gambling and place 2 or 3 links to my 
informational casino reviews site in the same method that is made 
for you; 1 link to the homepage and 2 more links to the inner pages 
of my site. 

have good PageRank :)

Thank you for your time and I'm looking forward for your reply,

If you visit the site Amy linked (don’t worry, it’s just a picture), I’m sure you would have responded exactly like I did.

From: Alex Papadimoulis
Sent: Sunday, July 01, 2012 4:29 PM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: Hello Alex Re: let's succeed together
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Wow, your website http://www.[redacted].com/ is beautiful like you 
said.

Is that you on the photo graph? You're pretty.

Amy replied with this a bit later.

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net 
Sent: Monday, July 02, 2012 1:08 AM
To: Alex Papadimoulis
Subject: Re: Hello Alex  Re: let's succeed togethe r
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Hello Alex  ,
Thanks for replying. Please make it clear if you would like the 
article so that I can send it to you asap. 

Thanks once again.

And to that, I replied with the first thing that came to mind.

From: Alex Papadimoulis
Sent: Tuesday, July 03, 2012 10:04 AM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: Hello Alex Re: let's succeed togethe r
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Dear Amy,

It's really hot out today. I'm hoping it rains, though.

Alex

I had to wait till the wee hours of the morning for Amy to respond to me again.

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Sent: Wednesday, July 04, 2012 1:23 AM
To: Alex Papadimoulis
Subject: Re: Hello Alex Re: let's succeed togethe r
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

hi alex:)

 a strange reply. kindly let us know if you woudl like to work 
with us.

 regards
 Amy

Did you see that? She used a smiley emoticon!! And directly attached it to a lowercase alex!! Clearly, Amy likes me.

From: Alex Papadimoulis 
Sent: Thursday, July 05, 2012 10:40 AM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: Hello Alex Re: let's succeed togethe r
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Dearest Amy,

My bad, I meant to send that to another Amy who sent me an email as 
well. 

The other Amy's email was about the weather, and I think told her 
that I'm want to succeed together... which was probably very 
strange to her.

But yes I want to work together. Who should I send an invoice to?

Warmest Regards,

Alex

I thought it was over, and that I had lost Amy forever. But she wrote back a few days later!

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Sent: Tuesday, July 10, 2012 6:53 AM
To: Alex Papadimoulis 
Subject: Re: Hello Alex  ARTICLE Right Site For Casino Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Hi :)
Good day
Sorry for the delay.
As desired I am sending the article-Right Site For Casino Gambling 
You can download the article from this link and press the button" 
DOWNLOAD" : http://www.mediafire.com/?zgl5k2ukwdwotqj

Please let me know as soon as you publish and send the url and also 
send the links that you want us to publish.

Waiting for your reply:)
Regards
 amy

Unfortunately, Amy’s timing was  a bit off.

From: Alex Papadimoulis
Sent: Tuesday, July 17, 2012 2:25 AM
To: 'amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net'
Subject: RE: Hello Alex ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

My Dearest Amy,

I am glad to see your email again. 

Actually, I am currently on a camping trip in the great plains near 
the Kansas-Nebraska border. It's very quiet here, but it's also very
pretty (like you), and I wish you were here to see it.  Maybe some 
day.

But... I will return home in a few days, and then I can publish the 
article you had put so much effort into making. I know my readers 
will love to learn about Casino Gambling!

Take care, I will reply to you as soon as I can.

Love,

Alex

But I just couldn’t stop thinking of her. So I sent her this, with pictures from Welfl@flickr.

From: Alex Papadimoulis 
Sent: Wednesday, July 18, 2012 11:39 PM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: Hello Alex ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
Attachments: for-amy1.jpg, for-amy2.jpg
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

My Dearest Amy,

I'm still on my camping trip in Kansas, but I was thinking about you
and took a couple of pictures to show you.

See what I mean, how pretty it is??

I'll write again when I get back in town.

Love,

Alex

Thankfully, it didn’t take her long to write back.

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Sent: Thursday, July 19, 2012 4:16 AM
To: Alex Papadimoulis
Subject: Re: Hello Alex  ARTICLE Right Site For Casino Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Hi Alex :-)

the picture is nice but now my webmaster wants to know how long 
will it take to publish the article.

Sorry to bother you on your holiday

regards
Amy

I felt bad for my dear Amy, getting hassled by her webmaster like that. But I had bigger problems on my plate… err, off it.

From: Alex Papadimoulis 
Sent: Tuesday, July 24, 2012 10:48 AM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: Hello Alex ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

My-Dearest-Amy,

I-have-finally-returned-from-my-camping-trip,-but-I-discovered-that-my-keyboard-has

broken,,,,,----I-spilled-some-maple-syrup-on-my-keys,-and-among-other-keys,-the-space

bar,-the-ecks-key,-and-the-dot-key-are-not-working,,,--and-my-password-has-these

characters-so-I-cannot-log-on,,,,---but-please-give-me-one-more-day-or-two,,,---and-I

will-post-this-wonderful-article-that-you-have-written-for-me,,,,----

I-hope-you-are-doing-well,,,---I-missed-you,-and-thought-about-you-on-my-trip,,,

Love,

Ale[cks]

Thankfully, My Dearest Amy didn’t forget about me and replied a few days later.

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Sent: Monday, July 30, 2012 7:52 AM
To: Alex Papadimoulis 
Subject: Re: Hello Alex  ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Hi :)
 Hope you are doing good. 

Kindly publish our article that I sent a few days back. I know you
must be terribly busy but we have put in a lot of effort in making 
an article for you and would like to see it get published. 

Also waiting for links from your side to complete the deal.

Regards:)
Amy

I could tell things were heating up. Note the TWO distinct smiley emoticons.

From: Alex Papadimoulis
Sent: Monday, July 30, 2012 10:04 AM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: Hello Alex ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

My Dearest Amy,

Thank you for writing again!!! 

:-)

>3

;-)

After my maple syrup incident, I had to get a whole new computer. 
Before I threw away my old computer, I wrote down your email 
address... but I must have written it as ".com" not as ".net". 
So when I emailed you, it came back as "address not found" or 
some strange error.

That made me sad. I thought you didn't want to be my friend any
more, or maybe you went and got a restraining order on me. But 
you're here now, so we can put that behind us!!

So can you please once again send me this article? I wanted to 
post already, but it was on my old computer which is covered in 
syrup and won't turn on anymore.

Love,

Alex

asdfasdfasd

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Sent: Tuesday, July 31, 2012 1:42 AM
To: Alex Papadimoulis
Subject: Re: Hello Alex  ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
Attachments: article.rtf

-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Hi Alex:)
Glad to hear form you.

Here is the article and please publish it asap as it is already 
delayed. thanks for your time and cooperation.

Finally, I could help my dear Amy!

From: Alex Papadimoulis (WTF) 
Sent: Tuesday, July 31, 2012 4:39 PM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: Hello Alex ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

My Dearest Amy,

:-)

As promised, your article has been published!

http://img.thedailywtf.com/images/alexp/for-amy.rtf
I am sorry this took such a long time, but I'm excited it is finally 
done!

Now, as you promised, could you please send a picture of yourself to
me? Preferably, in an outdoor location with trees and/or grass.

Love,

Alex

I’m sure that you can imagine my excitement when I received a reply back later that evening.

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net 
Sent: Wednesday, August 01, 2012 1:15 AM
To: Alex Papadimoulis
Subject: Re: Hello Alex ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Hi Alex:)
 Great to see that you  published our article. but if you visit 
the page, you can see that the code is not working. 
 <a href =”http://www.premiere-casinos.com/”> top recommended 
casinos online.</a> It has to be pasted in the html code to 
make the link work. could you please see to it?
will send you a pic as soon as I have one

 Regards:)

But wait… no attachment!? Nothing, none? Maybe if I upload the article, she’ll finally send it as she promised…

From: Alex Papadimoulis
Sent: Friday, August 03, 2012 12:06 AM
To: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Subject: RE: Hello Alex ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

My Dearest Amy,

I am still waiting on a picture from you :-(

You said that if I posted this article for you, then you would send 
me a picture. It is OK if you don't have one of you standing in 
front of some trees, but maybe one of you standing by an indoor 
plant would be nice. Or even a painting of a plant.

I did correct the article, it is posted over here: http://thedaily wtf.com/Articles/Re-Hello-Alex-ARTICLE-Right-Site-For-Casi-no-Ga mbling.aspx

Please my dear Amy, I really need the picture of you. I have been 
waiting so long now.

Love,

Alex

When I received a reply and didn’t see the paperclip attachment, I knew things weren’t looking good for Amy and I.

From: amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net
Sent: Friday, August 03, 2012 1:21 AM
To: Alex Papadimoulis
Subject: Re: Hello Alex ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

hi Alex
sorry but our article seems to be in a mess. You see it takes effort 
to write an article.Kindly correct it.
Regards

amy

And like that, I was left with no choice but to move on.

From: Alex Papadimoulis 
Sent: Tuesday, August 07, 2012 11:35 AM
To: 'amy.thompson@seosearchresults.net'
Subject: RE: Hello Alex :-) ARTICLE Right Site For Casi no Gambling
-------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Amy,

I did not want to do this over email, but I think I have to.

We need to break up. Our relationship has felt very one-way for a 
very long time, and I don't think we should be boyfriend/girlfriend
anymore. 

Take care,
Alex

To this day, I still think of the fond times that My Dearest Amy and I had together.

via: [The Daily WTF]